Philly-based Eco-Feminist Duo’s ‘Curious’ LP Inspires Kids to Love Their Planet

By Marisa Torrieri Bloom

Earth Day isn’t just about recycling a few plastic bottles, yet many young kids might think of it that way. But good pals Julie Beth (a music therapist) and Anya Rose (a science teacher) believe kids can be inspired to do so much more to make our planet a cleaner, brighter place.2019 album _Curious_ Cover-2

In fact, it’s that thinking that birthed the Philly-area activists’ duo Ants on a Log, which is now performing a musical based on its latest album Curious: Think Outside the Pipeline!

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Ants on a Log performing live. 

The album and engaging live performance are based on real science and math concepts, filled with pretty harmonies, riddles and fun characters. (Spoiler alert: One of the characters is gender neutral, which is naturally woven into the story line.)

Among the album guests are WXPN Kids Corner host Kathy O’Connell playing “Mom,” John McCutcheon as the “Senator,” and Philadelphia hip-hop artist Sterling Duns as “Businessman.”

We recently caught up with Anya Rose of Ants on a Log to talk about this record and upcoming shows in the spring and summer.

Rockmommy: How did you get into writing this style of music?

Anya Rose: We like to write clever and catchy songs and we can’t help it if they sometimes get in people’s heads. We wanted to experiment with creating a show that had a story arc and characters, as opposed to an album of unconnected songs. We also know that kids respond really well to both storytelling and music, so it’s the best of both worlds if there is a message you want to convey. We also like the idea of an album that is meant to be listened to all in one sitting, as opposed to piecemeal.

Rockmommy: “Curious” delivers a powerful message: What is missing from today’s “kids” music?

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Ants on a Log, performing live.

Anya Rose: Well, first I will say that there is a lot of great kids’ music out there today. It is a friendly community of professionals helping each other out. We really love Alastair Moock and Billy Jonas to name a couple. Also, Trout Fishing in America is always a classic.

One thing missing are more female performers. There also aren’t a lot of female duos for some reason. A lot of kids music’ is written for ages 0 to 5, but we write for slightly older audiences. We want our listeners to be able to understand a joke here and there and some of our songs require more listening then songs for the 0 to 5 range, which involve more repetition. Content-wise, we don’t want to be afraid of delivering true messages.

For some reason, the idea of being kind has now been politicized. Pollution, climate change, and fighting for the Earth have also been politicized. This is silly to us, and I think it seems silly to children as well. Yes, there are some complexities and nuances in stories when it comes to business and development, but when it gets right down to it, you just should not pollute the Earth. That’s pretty simple. And we aren’t afraid to say so with our music.

Rockmommy: What do you try to do during live shows to connect with your audience?

Anya Rose: We are constantly developing and modifying our live shows. There are a few things we do in person that we don’t do on a recording simply because the experience is very different. On a live show, we have been developing a drumming and jump rope routine for example. We also want to explore physical comedy more. It’s fun to see how live audiences react and then to modify our future shows accordingly. Julie once led what they named “The Vegetable Game” which would make no sense to anyone unless you were there, and it was absolutely hilarious. I won’t say anymore. You’ll just have to come to one of our shows!

Rockmommy: It’s been noted that one of the characters is gender neutral. Why is that important to highlight for younger listeners?

Anya Rose: We support the idea that kids should be able to be who they want to be. Julie goes by “they” and Anya goes by “she”, but our respective genders are just a small part of who we are. That’s the same for other character, “Taylor” in the musical. We want to normalize it for kids.

Rockmommy: How can kids can be more mindful and conscious of their physical environment?

Anya Rose: One very concrete thing that I see both kids and adults doing is leaving the water running when you aren’t using it. Stop doing that! Just today, I watched one of my 1stgrade students get a drink of water at the water fountain. He turned around to talk to me and he left his hand on the fountain button, running. And he had a very long story to tell me! The fact that water comes out of the tap is essentially as crazy as the idea of money growing on trees. We take it for granted. Clean water — water that will not make us sick, water that is good to drink — comes out of our tap and all we have to do is turn it on! Well it’s just as easy to turn it off. So adults, when you do the dishes, and you step away from the sink for a second, just turn that water off.

Another major one is simply consuming less. You know all that stuff you like to buy? Stop buying new stuff! Thrift stores are incredible places. Clothing swaps are super fun. Also, rocks and sticks are a joy to play with! Many kids are surprised to learn that plastic is made of oil. And oil production contributes greatly to climate change.

Letters from kids can be very powerful. If you are a kid and there is an issue that is bothering you, ask an adult to help you figure out whom to write to. As long as you do your research and your letter comes from your own head and your own concerns, this is a great way to have an impact. Make it personal. Tell a story. Share your feelings. and then send it to the right person who can actually do something about it.

Rockmommy: Who are your musical/artistic inspirations?

Anya Rose: Billy Jonas, Alastair Moock, Lucy Kalentari, Tom Lehrer, Jim Copp, Flight of the Conchords, City Love, John McCutcheon. Three of the people on that list, by the way, are on this album! We also love anything with good harmonies. The very first time the two of us ever got together to play music, we sang a Be Good Tanyas song. That was how we knew we would work well together musically!

Ants on a Log are playing on Saturday, April 27, 10 a.m., at the Day of Play at Parent Infant Center in West Philadelphia, and on Sunday, April 28, at the Earth Day Celebration in Downingtown, PA. The Ants take the stage around 2:15 pm.

Want to learn more, so you can plan a fun, engaging family outing? Details are available online here.

‘Daddy Issues’: Why the 2019 Indie Film is Perfect for Mommy’s Next Date Night In

by Marisa Torrieri Bloom

Provider. Breadwinner. Jack-of-all-trades. These days, dads are so much more than these singular identities suggest. But the definition of “father figure” truly hits another level in the film “Daddy Issues,” available for download on April 19.

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Daddy Issues movie — ready to download, just in time for Easter.

A quick synopsis: When queer pixie Maya (Madison Lawlor) falls for social media starlet Jasmine (Montana Manning), her life is about to change in profound, unexpected ways. But little does Maya, who would do anything to escape her miserable, suburban upbringing, know that her Insta-crush has a secret: an illicit, ongoing love affair with a guy she calls Daddy (Andrew Pifko) who pays her bills but keeps her tied down (in more ways than one).

“Daddy Issues” isn’t the kind of Netflix flick you’d watch with your 6-year-old. It’s full of adults-only sexual explorations and powerful, jarring intersections that’ll stick with you long after the credits roll. But it is the kind of movie that makes you want to tuck in the kiddos and then race to the living room to snuggle up with your sweetie (or a bottle of Prosecco) for some intimate, grown-up screen time (just make sure they’re sleeping first, OK?).

Here we talk to award-winning director Amara Cash on parenting, love and inspiration – and why “Daddy Issues” is the best way to experience your next date night in.

Rockmommy: ‘Daddy Issues’ is a coming-of-age story. What was the inspiration for Maya’s character?

Amara Cash: Well, from the onset, screenwriter Alex Bloom and I knew we wanted to do a movie with a queer protagonist. For the details of Maya, specifically, I was inspired by the beautiful artistry, makeup, and fashion of the subcultures Pastel emo, Lolita goth, and pixie that I found on Instagram, Pinterest, and BLOGS.

Rockmommy: Why is a film like ‘Daddy Issues’ resonating so well with filmgoers (especially millennials)?

Amara Cash: My approach often resonates with millennials because of the style and aesthetic. It’s fast-paced and explores sexuality and alternative lifestyle in an objective, non-judgmental way. Although love triangles are classic, I’ve never seen one from this angle!

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‘Daddy Issues’ Director Amara Cash on set.

Rockmommy: Our readers are often parents struggling with the pressure to be amazing parents. How do the parents in the movie struggle to do the same?

Amara Cash: This movie isn’t exactly stacked with model parents, but I think most parents, most of the time, are doing their best. In ‘Daddy Issues’ we spend a lot of time exploring why people are the way they are; how their past informs their present. This is especially true with the parents in the movie.

Rockmommy: Is ‘Daddy Issues’ more of a “let’s snuggle on the couch and watch this” movie or a “let’s have our friends over and get smashed” movie?

Amara Cash: I think it can be both. The film is equally romantic, exciting and disturbing and it’s quite a ride. So if you’re snuggling, hold on tight, and if you’re partying, just let go.

Rockmommy: If Daddy were to give parenting advice, what would it be?

Amara Cash: Encourage your children to be who they are and be there for them wherever they go.

Download ‘Daddy Issues’ on iTunes.

Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the founder and editor of Rockmommy.

Nashville Pop-Rock Dad Zach Vinson on New Record and Being a ‘Better Man’

By Marisa Torrieri Bloom

Anyone who’s spent more than a day in Nashville knows that a musician’s struggle to keep up with the scene is real. Nashville-based pop-rock singer, songwriter and dad Zach Vinson can relate. Finding new inspiration is tough, and his latest record And Yet doesn’t fit neatly into any of the more popular album themes (e.g., love, breakup, politics).

What it does cover, however, is far grittier and more interesting. Songs like “Better Man” address the challenge of stability, staying steady, embracing the mundane of day-to-day life and not throwing in the towel when life gets tough. It’s also a record influenced by parenting and life with his toddler son.

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Zach Vinson, Nashville pop-rocker, papa and husband

Rockmommy recently caught up with Vinson to talk about all of this (his album drops in April).

Rockmommy: I love the concept of your album — the idea of adjusting to life and staying in love. How did the idea to make this kind of record come about?

Zach Vinson: It wasn’t me sitting down and thinking, ‘Oh, I should write an album about this.’ It was just a matter of writing what I was living. My wife and I have been married almost 10 years now, and the last few have been a journey of realizing a lot of hard things — the baggage we’ve accumulated over our lifetime, the ways we don’t fit together well, the unhealthy rhythms we’ve fallen into over the years, etc. — and having to decide if we were up for the pain and mess and crazy hard work of moving forward together rather than throwing in the towel.

Rockmommy: Your son is adorable in the Instagram pics. When did you become a parent (not sure if you have other kids)? How did that change your outlook?

Zach Vinson: We just have one son, and he’s about two and a half. He’s something else. In terms of our marriage, it definitely provided great motivation for us to work things out. But it’s also easy to fall into a trap of ‘oh, we have a kid, so we need to stay together for their sake.’ I don’t think that’s a helpful mindset. You have to actually do the work to make your home a healthy environment, which I think we’re very much still in the process of doing.

Rockmommy: How did that influence your music?

Zach Vinson: Hmm, that’s a good question. I think having a kid gives some urgency and accountability to my efforts as a musician. In other words, if I’m going to take time away from my family to pursue music, I better be as excellent as I can be. Full-ass, not half-ass (mom, if you’re reading this, sorry for the cussing!). This record is as “all-in” as I’ve been, and I’m really proud of how it turned out, so maybe I have him to thank for that in a roundabout way.

Rockmommy: Is it challenging to balance a creative profession with the rigors of parenthood?

Zach Vinson: Yes and no. The hard parts are traveling, having a less-steady paycheck, and never feeling like I’m “done” with work. And those things add some extra weight to my wife’s shoulders, too, which I don’t take lightly. But on the other hand, my flexible schedule has allowed me to be present for my family in ways that other people with more traditional jobs aren’t able to be, and I love that. As with all of life, there are trade-offs, and I just try to be intentional with the trade-offs I’m choosing.

Rockmommy: What are your favorite kinds of songs to play?

Zach Vinson: It’s so dependent on the audience and the venue. There are songs I love playing in certain contexts that are completely lousy in other situations. But I don’t think you can beat playing a good slow song for a pin-drop-quiet room.

Rockmommy: What advice do you have to other rocker dads/piano dads like yourself who may be struggling with the business of their personal lives in an ever-changing, ever challenging world?

Zach Vinson: It’s a lot to juggle, for sure. You can’t get so focused on music that you take the stability of your family for granted. But I also think it’s important for my son to see me taking my passions seriously and making time/space for things that are life-giving to me.

Rockmommy: I see just three tour dates — any shows this summer in the books?

Zach Vinson: There are a few things in the work. Some festival dates I can’t announce yet, a week in Germany where I’ll be playing keys for another artist, a month-long residency at a camp, and probably a few more solo and full band dates as well. But I realized a few years ago that I didn’t want to be on a trajectory of playing 150 to 200 dates a year with having a family, so I pick and choose my spots to tour a little more carefully.

Listen to Zach Vinson’s singles “Better Man” & “Hold My Son” on Spotify.

Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the editor and founder of Rockmommy.

Looking Back: Our Favorite Rockmommy Interviews of 2018

From monster boogies to mommy love songs and loud concerts galore, 2018 brought us lots of great rockin’ fun. And plenty of wisdom.  

Here, we share the best advice from rockmommies and rockdaddies featured over the last 12 months on this blog. 

“Don’t lose yourself in being a parent. If you want to be in a band, go for it. Because you need to have some sort of outlet for yourself. If you can have time for yourself, that makes you a better parent.”

Jodi Jeffers, mom of 3 and lead singer of The Ramoms

“As parents and musicians, we like to think we’re really cool, but kids are kids and have their own taste. Don’t force them to listen to Velvet Underground. Let them listen to Disney.” 

Rafael Atijas, dad and founder of Loog guitars

“I know that sometimes as mothers, we feel guilty and selfish when we take time out for ourselves. Making my music and self-care are musts for me. I have to do both in order to come back and parent more fully, more present, and fulfilled.”

Renee Stahl, mom, singer and songwriter

“I’m an extreme example of where singing silly songs with your offspring can go … the songs [my daughter and I] created came from everyday activities.”

Ben Rudnick, dad, singer and songwriter

“I think the best way to write a song for kids is to listen to what they are saying, watch what they’re doing, and think about what they enjoy. Then use those things as inspiration to develop songs that are relevant and interesting to them. And try singing the songs with them while you’re writing them! You’ll see right away what works and what doesn’t.”

Laurie Berkner, rockmommy extraordinaire

“How do I get through this all? I am into Buddhist meditation … I got the advice from a Buddhist perspective to bring as much humanity as I can into everything I do. People ask how do I do it all, the answer is by chanting and Buddhist meditation. You also need to take the time to refresh, take an occasional nap, get enough sleep, eat properly.” 

Sharissa Reichert, singer, washboard player and MILF of MILF & DILF

“I think having a schedule is important, a set time when you show up for writing, maybe in a specific place. It doesn’t have to be for a long time. Just something to keep you from getting rusty.” 

Shawn Colvin, mom and singer-songwriter 

“For a while I would try to squeeze [practice] in, but really nothing was happening. So I really had to say, ‘OK I’m going to get a sitter for a couple of hours a week. This is a real thing and important to me and I’m going to do it.’”

Cheri Magill, singer, pianist and mom 

“Every other year, starting in 2013, I write a song a week (so 2013, 2015, 2017 and next year 2019). This has really helped me to break out of the “only writing when I felt inspired” habit. It’s forced me to sit down and focus on being creative, which was alien to me. Now, regardless of how I am feeling, I can sit down and start the writing process and get myself into that creative space without having to wait for it to appear magically. It’s like a muscle that needs to be exercised. That has really helped with my musical and creative discipline.” 

Zach Parkman, singer, songwriter and dad

“If music is really your passion, find a way to do it. I say, ‘happy mommy happy child.’”

Dana Fuchs, mom and blues singer

“Obviously as a mom you want to spend as much time with your kids as you can. But motherhood is also about being someone your kid to look up to. It’s not just about the quantity of time, but about you giving an example of being a more authentic version of yourself.” 

Jennifer Deale, mom, singer & keyboardist

 

Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the editor and founder of Rockmommy.

Inside the Loog Guitar: Not Your Typical Preschooler’s Instrument

by Marisa Torrieri Bloom 

Most kids these days learn how to play “guitar” by playing their parents’ ukuleles, or strumming off-key notes on a cheap plastic instrument featuring animated characters. But while wielding these would-be guitars makes for cute Instagram videos, much of the time, kids playing with them aren’t actually learning how to play guitar.

I would know. I have two sons ages 4 and 6, and about one zillion videos of them aimlessly strumming my ukulele. And does either one of them know how to play guitar? Unfortunately, the answer is a big, fat “no.” They both think it’s too hard.

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Loog Guitar (shown here in red)

What I’m describing is actually a common scenario in the households of musician parents with the best intentions for their offspring, according to Rafael Atijas, founder and CEO of Loog Guitars. 

“There are ukuleles, and they’re great but they’re not guitars,” Atijas told Rockmommy. “And then there are other guitars that are cheaply made and come apart.” 

In creating Loog Guitars just three years ago, Atijas’ intention was to design something that would be fun, stimulating, simple to play and easy to learn. The result is a bold, cool-looking three-string guitar that’s easy to play. Strings are made of nylon, not metal, and are easy to push down. Designed for ages 3 and up, the Loog is the ideal, personalized “starter” axe. And it’s so fun to play that even adults like it. 

We recently caught up with Atijas, who is now a father of two, to talk about why the Loog line of guitars — which start at about $60 — are a solid investment for burgeoning rockers. 

Rockmommy: So how and why did Loog get started? 

Rafael Atijas: I saw the same gap that you saw. There are ukuleles, and they’re great but they’re not guitars. And then there are other guitars that are cheaply made and come apart. So I thought, you know, what if there were a guitar that was fun to play, easy and stimulating? So we made a guitar with three notes in its most basic form (GBE strings). At first [the guitar] had open tuning, with more of the lower strings. But then we decided that for [kids] to learn, it was good to have standard tuning. 

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Loog Guitar Founder & CEO Rafael Atijas

Rockmommy: Can you tell us about your background? 

Rafael Atijas: I’m a musician – I was in a band when I was younger. I created Loog guitars when I was working on my master’s at NYU, because I wanted to do something related to music. It’s a business, but it’s inspired by the fact that I play guitar and am a musician. When I came up with the guitar idea, I didn’t have kids yet but I had a niece. It was up to me to teach her the basics. And I realized then, because she was 6 at the time, that you can’t teach kids on these [bad] guitars, or even 3/4 size guitars. The six strings is too overwhelming when they’re that young. 

Rockmommy: What was the response from music teachers and the parents? 

Rafael Atijas: Music teachers have been very responsive, which is great, because as you know, some guitarists can be music snobs … there are some kids that can play out of the box with a standard guitar, but 90 percent of kids can’t. In fact, 90 percent of people who learn to play guitar quit. So we are trying to solve that in a way that makes people want to graduate to a standard, six-string guitar. For a five-year-old, six-year-old, eight-year-old, [starting with a Loog guitar] makes it easier for them to learn guitar. We have many music schools using our guitars. Even smaller guitars, like ¾ guitars, are just more difficult – and it’s easier to grasp three fingers than six fingers. We even have some adults using our guitars. 

Rockmommy: What about the argument that it’s better to start with something harder?  

Rafael Atijas: I started with bass guitar – which was something harder – but we’ve found that when learning guitar it’s better to have some sense of accomplishment, or mastery [built in]. 

Rockmommy: What about your own children? 

Rafael Atijas: I have a three-year-old son and he loves it. My six-year-old girl likes it when I play, but I try not to push it on my children. If you push it on them, they will see it as something they are being forced to do. One of my kids is really into music, and the other is, just a normal amount. 

Rockmommy: What’s your advice for parents? 

Rafael Atijas: Be aware of the music they like. As parents and musicians, we like to think we’re really cool, but kids are kids and have their own taste. Don’t force them to listen to Velvet Underground. Let them listen to Disney. 

For a limited time, Rockmommy readers get a 10 percent discount off their Loog Guitar purchase [Use the code ROCKMOMMY at Checkout]. 

Collette McLafferty Finds Her Most Powerful Voice in The Wake of $10 Million Pink Cover Band Lawsuit

by Marisa Torrieri Bloom 

With her eye-catching red hair and spectacular, soaring vocals, New York City siren Collette McLafferty was one of the most sought-after Big Apple singers in the early 2000s, when she transplanted to the city and founded her indie band edibleRed.

And while her story never ended in sold-out arena tours on the level of Lady Gaga, she got a lot further than me and most of my peers. At the band’s peak, around 2004, edibleRed was a staple of Lower Manhattan nightclubs and a favorite of the MTV Buzzworthy crowd.

But shortly thereafter, the music industry started to favor teen pop singers over gals strumming guitars. After shedding tears over the end of an era (and her band), Collette decided to pursue session work, and was invited to join several lucrative cover bands. It wasn’t original music, but for a singer in her mid-30s in a super-competitive marketplace, it was a pretty sweet life that paid the rent. 

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Collette McLafferty’s new memoir “Confessions of a Bad, Ugly Singer” is out now.

In 2014, when Collette was asked to sing for a P!NK cover band on a temporary basis by a seemingly nice guy named Rik who’d auditioned for edibleRed years before, it seemed like a no brainer. A short-term freelance project with no strings attached. But then the guy’s lawyer buddy (Charles Bonfante) got wind of the project and filed a lawsuit to the tune of $10 million, claiming Collette co-conspired to steal his idea for a Long Island P!NK tribute band. [You can read the actual lawsuit by clicking here]. 

The 112-page lawsuit caught the attention of media outlets like the New York Post — but that only seemed to make things worse. Although the lawsuit was riddled with insults against Collette for her voice and appearance, it never mentioned Collette’s age (she was over 30, which was ancient for pop stars). Still, click-bait headlines like “Singer Sued for Being Too Old and Ugly” dominated the search engines. 

Embarrassed and angry, Collette was determined to fight this off, clear her name and rise above the naysayers — ultimately to prove that a woman doesn’t have to stop singing the minute she turns 30 (or 40, or even 50).

Four years later, Collette’s determination has exceeded her own expectations. In addition to becoming one of the most vocal advocates against frivolous lawsuits, Collette’s penned a memoir about her experience, and racked up tons of new EDM singing gigs. Oh, and she’s working on a new album out, too, called “42.” 

I recently caught up with Collette in Manhattan to chat about the insanity of what she now calls “P!NK Tributegate,” and some of the lessons she hopes to pass on from that crazy experience. Her memoir, Confessions of a Bad Ugly Singer (New Haven Publishing) is out now, and it’s incredible. [Rockmommy reached out to Mr. Bonfante on Friday morning at 11:30 a.m. regarding this memoir. He said he had “no comment” for this article].

I read the book in two sittings, and identify with everything Collete talks about— the ageism and the sexism that’s inherent in the music industry as well as the beautiful opportunities that lie ahead if you open your mind to what’s possible. 

Here, Collette herself tells it better than anyone else: 

Rockmommy: When you first came to New York and started performing, what were your biggest fears and about making it as a musician?

Collette McLafferty: To be honest, I was pretty fearless when I first started. I was a rock star in my head; it was only a matter of time until everyone knew it. My biggest fear was that I would get signed and shelved or critically panned (the latter became true). Other then that, I was convinced I would be a rock star. Oddly, I’m glad that didn’t happen because I had so many life lessons I needed to learn. To be fair, a lot of musicians in the New York music scene had that mindset. We all thought we were on the verge of blowing up. You kind of had to think that way, as the scene could be cutthroat sometimes. This was back in the day when record labels had more power and we actually needed them. There was no YouTube, no Spotify. You couldn’t make a music video on your cell phone. As I started getting into the industry on a larger level, I noticed the values I was asked to embody didn’t line up with the real me. I was told to never have a female-fronted band open for us or make sure to cleverly disguise my real age in interviews.

Rockmommy: You talk in your book about how your music was a big hit in the early 2000s when every label in the country wanted to sign alt-rock girls with guitars. When did you realize the tides were turning, with the resurgence of teenage pop music?

Collette McLafferty: The Spice Girls and Backstreet Boys paved the way during the Lilith Fair era, but Britney [Spears] changed the game. Her sales went through the roof in a way the industry had never experienced before. During the wave of angsty female pop, edibleRed was just getting started. Labels were looking for bands like us to ride the wave of Alanis Morissette, Jewel, Tracy Bonham, Garbage, and No Doubt. By the time we were ready to go pro, the industry changed overnight. I remember watching Melissa Etheridge, Paula Cole and Shawn Colvin give an award to Christina Aguilera. You could see the changing of the guard right there on TV. It happened in the blink of an eye. Suddenly, the same executives who told me I was young and promising at 26 were now informing me my time had passed. The women who dominated commercial radio in the late ’90s completely vanished. Rock bands were dropped by their labels en masse. It felt like an apocalypse of sorts. As new female artists got younger, women my age started to get shamed for existing. This wasn’t a thing when I was growing up. I was used to seeing rock stars on their thirties, forties and beyond.

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New York City singer Collette McLafferty’s memoir, “Confessions of a Bad, Ugly Singer” chronicles her journey from gawky adolescent to MTV and the lawsuit that almost destroyed her.

Rockommy: Can you talk about your feelings in transitioning from edibleRed to gigging in cover bands? You describe some pretty powerful emotions when one of your bandmates got married, as the end of an era.

Collette McLafferty: To this day, I am so embarrassed that I couldn’t stop crying at [my drummer] Tom’s wedding for all the WRONG reasons! Everyone in the band was growing up in a way that I wasn’t. They were moving on to bigger bands, 9-to-5 jobs, spouses and kids. I was obsessed with edibleRed and making a career out of the band. It never occurred to me that the band might not take over the world. I had put every egg in this basket for 10 years and didn’t have much of a life outside the band — edibleRed WAS my life. I worked on the band morning, noon, and night. I realized I had to let everyone move on to their new chapters even if I felt left behind. We had many milestones: we played for 10,000 people, had our 15 minutes on MTV Buzzworthy and got a record deal — but the industry was going through a shake up. We weren’t hitting the big time, and we couldn’t keep living the starving artist lifestyle. It was time to grow up and I didn’t want to. Dave Eggar (a former edibleRed cellist who now tours with Evanescence) gave me some pretty solid advice. Even though we flopped on a commercial level, just getting signed and having a record come out was a win. He convinced me to leverage the experience for a solo career or session career down the line. He was right. Once our cover of “Hey Ya” got its lightening-fast nod from MTV, booking singing work was a breeze. I sang on commercials, records at weddings and in cover bands. I was constantly booked. There was only one thing I loved more then singing. That was singing and getting paid.

Rockmommy: Your name was dragged into a lawsuit over a PINK cover band, and although you had never met Chuck [Bonfante, the guy who sued you], the fact that you were called a co-conspirator was shocking. As the case dragged on, were there moments you thought it would never end?

Collette McLafferty: During the two years of litigation I felt as if my life was on hold. My happiness was on hold. My sense of peace was on hold. My sanity was on hold. In the beginning, I thought I would go to court, the judge would laugh and it would be over. At first I thought every court date would be the last court date. The lawsuit was so stupid, I couldn’t imagine the court system allowing it to continue to take up space. I didn’t realize that a court case could take years. Because  I was sued by a lawyer representing himself, he had the power to keep me in the system indefinitely. I have spoken to people who have been in cases for ten years! It’s insane. The sense of not knowing when or how it would end drove me to some pretty dark places. I would start my day with a cup of coffee walking down the street and having an actual out-loud conversation cursing out Chuck! It wasn’t pretty. When I realized it could be a years-long battle, I started day drinking and telling every Lower East Side bartender about my troubles. Imagine the top 5 most stressful days of your life. Now imagine those 5 days elongated to 2 years. It felt like hell on earth.

Rockmommy: Do you regret your decision to reach out to the New York Post because of the way they interpreted your story and used an unflattering and inaccurate headline to drive “clicks”?

Collette McLafferty: I don’t regret calling the New York Post at all! Chuck painted me into a corner. He initially wouldn’t let me out of the case even though I had done nothing wrong. I missed my first filing deadline because I didn’t know what I was doing. By the time I got representation, my lawyer asked Chuck for an extension to answer. Chuck denied it and told Martin (Kera, my first lawyer) that it was because of Rik that I found myself in the “unenviable position of being in his cross hairs” and that if I thought getting sued once was inconvenient I would “certainly hate a second lawsuit for defamation of character” due to the fact that Rik was trashing him on Facebook. He basically admitted in writing that he was going after me because of someone else’s actions.

At this point there is no way out. Calling the press was an absolute necessity, it definitely wasn’t something I wanted to do. I was six weeks into litigation and my legal bills were over $3,200. I was also living in construction and Chuck’s case was delaying my move. I asked Martin if I should go to the press. Martin and I agreed that if we got the case a quick blurb in the paper, Chuck would drop it. We were right. A couple hours after the New York Post ran the bogus headline “Singer Sued for Being Too Old and Too Ugly For P!NK Cover Band”, Chuck called Martin to drop it. This was after 6 weeks of sheer torture from a man who made it clear he wanted to keep me in the system.

I was initially very grateful to the New York Post for this. Chuck had a stipulation: he wanted me to sign a nondisclosure and act as if nothing happened. When I insisted he pay my legal fees and damages, he offered half!! Out of self respect I had to decline and fight this to the end. I was actually shocked that they took the angle they did because the real story was more interesting.

Rockmommy: If you could swap another headline for that one, what would it be?

Collette McLafferty: Disclaimer: I am not a headline writer, but I’ll give it a shot:

  1. “Two men in their 50s fight over a P!NK Tribute Band after Elder Fraud Investigation by Chase Bank” 
  2. “Rik and Chuck: the real life Steel Dragon.” 
  3. “Personal Injury Attorney Bludgeons Cover Band Singer with Legal Fees” (from my lawyer Martin) 
  4. “Grown-ass man and personal injury attorney refers to former best friend, bandmate and client as a ‘sleazy crony’ in 112-page legal document.”
  5. “Two Men Fight Like Tiny Toddlers”! (My favorite,  from an actress named Corbette Pasko).

Rockmommy: What is the biggest silver lining in this whole lawsuit? Is it Collette’s Law? A sense of empowerment in the #metoo era?

Collette McLafferty: I think the silver lining is that I’m not dead. Statistically, I was supposed to crumble. I was supposed to lose and get clobbered. I took on a lawyer, major media outlets and The Trial Lawyers’ Lobby. The upper echelons of the music industry turned its collective back on me by refusing to acknowledge any of this happened. While I could see many people supported me, it felt like the world was against me. I felt suicidal, but stayed alive because I had two senior rescue cats to feed. They needed me and that was enough. I had always hoped that P!NK Tributegate would have some epic ending …. Chuck would publicly apologize, P!NK would finally make a statement, Collette’s Law would pass…someone would make a Lifetime for Women made for TV movie… none of those things have happened yet. So the desire to live is my happy ending.  Beyond that, many people know a whole lot more about the legal system then they did before as a result of my case. I definitely feel empowered.

The “me too” movement goes way beyond sexual assault. Women have been “mind assaulted” by a certain sector of the mainstream media for decades now. Eating disorders wouldn’t exist without the endless berating, age-and-looks shaming we have experienced endlessly, day after day. The New York Post headline “Singer Sued for Being Too Old and Too Ugly for P!NK Cover Band”, represents an outdated view of women, one that we are not tolerating anymore.

Rockmmommy: Are you gigging again? What are your plans now that this whole ordeal is over?

Collette McLafferty: I started working on a pop/electronica album called “42” back in 2015. When I was about 90 percent done, I was hit with another round of legal fees. It completely derailed the project, so I am hoping to finish that soon. My passion right now is studio work, so that is where my focus will be. My dream is to move somewhere dirt cheap, build a studio and make music all day. Over the last few years I have been working as a vocalist in the EDM scene. I’ve worked with producers all over the world, most of them I have never met! I’m looking forward to taking that to the stage when the time is right.

I’m going to debut a couple songs at The Parkside Lounge on Oct 17th! I will be reading a couple chapters from “Confessions of a Bad, Ugly Singer” and playing some songs that are mentioned in the book. It will be me and a guitar and a couple of friends on stage with me. I have thought about potentially turning “Confessions of a Bad, Ugly Singer” into a musical. There has also been some very early interest in a potential movie, but I don’t want to get ahead of myself. If there is anything I have learned, plans are fluid. Nothing ever turns out exactly as planned, so I am trying to keep an open mind as to what the next chapter entails!

Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the editor and founder of Rockmommy. 

The Green Orbs’ Heather Hirshfield on Music, Videos and Raising Teenage Girls

by Marisa Torrieri Bloom

The Green Orbs’ music is infectious and silly, as in laugh-out-loud silly — and that’s exactly what the band, made up of brother-sister duo Heather Hirshfield and Eddie Rosenberg III, want you to do. Don’t believe me? Just watch the carnival-worthy “Mr. Mustache,” and you’ll agree. We sat down with Hirshfield, a piano teacher and mom of three, to get the scoop on the band’s upcoming release, Thumb Wrestling Champions (out September 7). 

Green Orbs_ukes_photo credit Nicole Michaelis

The Green Orbs

Rockmommy: You have an amazing musical background! What did you listen to growing up?

Heather Hirshfield: I listened to a wide variety of music growing up. My parents had a really cool domed-top deco record player and a huge collection of records and 45s that we listened to on a daily basis. The Beatles were very popular in the house, but we also listened to Billy Joel, Paul Simon, The Beach Boys, Beethoven, Mozart…..gosh, really so many great artists and composers to list! When I received my own record player as a present, I listened to a lot of musical soundtracks like Grease and Annie, and also Disney storybook records. My sister and I loved to put on The Monkees and dance around our room. We really were constantly listening to music. Music was, and continues to be, a huge part of my life.

Rockmommy: Before the Green Orbs, did you play other music? What was that like?

Heather Hirshfield: As a kid, I played piano, and played marching trombone in the marching band. I enjoyed both immensely, but I gave both up when I went to college which in hindsight was a huge mistake. After having my children, I started playing piano again and remembered how much I loved it. I did not really perform anything, though, until my brother and I started The Green Orbs.

Rockmommy: I read a bit about how you and your brother got started — can you tell me about how your latest collection of songs came about? Was there an inspiring idea/theme?

Heather Hirshfield: Our new album “Thumb Wrestling Champions” is the end result after many, many years of work. We were just writing different fun songs over the years, until we realized we had enough for an album! There is no overarching theme, but many of the songs were inspired by my girls, either through stories that I told them when they were little, or by something that they may have said.

Rockmommy: Let’s talk about video for a second. In the era of YouTube, having a video that connects to your audience is super important. How do you come up with the concepts for the video? Do you and Eddie sit around and brainstorm? Do you seek feedback from little ones on what connects?

Heather Hirshfield: We have been talking about videos a lot for this album! We haven’t had a brainstorm session specifically for videos … we just share ideas as they come to us. Personally, OK Go’s videos have been a huge inspiration for what is possible in a music video and I hope one day to be able to create a video as epic as theirs! As far as feedback, our niece and nephews are our sounding board right now.

Rockmommy: What are your most popular songs? is there a particular age group that connects with your music?

Heather Hirshfield: We have played some of our songs from the album for school children and “Doug the Bug” is always a huge hit. “The Suction Cup Shuffle” is also well-liked because it gets everyone up and dancing. We also have a group of songs in the YouTube Audio Library, and an instrumental song called “Splashing Around” that my brother wrote is hugely popular!

I think that kids 3-12 will really enjoy “Thumb Wrestling Champions,” but, of course, we hope that anyone who listens to it will enjoy it!

Rockmommy: You have three daughters! How old are they? What are some of the challenges you have with balancing motherhood and making music and everything else?

Heather Hirshfield: My girls are now 18, 16, and 13, and it is still a struggle finding time to do anything! I am so fortunate to be able to work out of my home as a piano teacher and musician for the last few years so I am here when they need me. On the other side of that, though, I really had to work on setting boundaries with them and letting them know that I can’t drop everything to get them a snack when I am working on something on the computer. It was also hard for me to realize that what I was working on was important and that I didn’t have to be at my kids’ beck and call constantly.

Rockmommy: What advice do you have for other rock n roll playing mommies (and daddies)?

Heather Hirshfield: My advice would be to always do what you love and remember that it is important that your kids see that you are passionate about whatever it is that you are doing, whether it be work or a hobby, so that they will have the desire to go out and find their own passions.

For more, check out the band’s social media feeds: Facebook, Instagram & Twitter

Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the editor and founder of Rockmommy.