by Marisa Torrieri Bloom 

For years, I’ve wondered what my life would  be like with a looper pedal — but until recently, it didn’t occur to me to go out and buy one. I usually play with bandmates, and a second guitarist takes care of the solos (when I’m the singer) or the melodic rhythm parts (when I’m the lead guitarist).

The Ditto Looper pedal is beautiful, and looks easy to use. But for time-pressed moms? Maybe not so much. 

But as I’ve found myself far north of Brooklyn, N.Y., with far less time and fewer resources to take a train into the city to practice with my beloved bass-playing pal Morgan and various others, I’ve found myself playing solo much more often. Because I’m a mom, time is more precious than ever — and free, creative “me” time is 1,000 times harder to get (without sacrificing time with my kids).

But a few weeks ago, as I was listening to Creedence Clearwater Revival’s take on “I Put a Spell on You,” I found myself imagining what it would be like to rip out a bluesy solo over chords that played in the background, like a second guitarist.

So I took the plunge — the $187 plunge, to be exact. I headed to the local Music & Arts Center in my town and purchased the Ditto Looper pedal. The thing is supposed to be so easy to use that the company that makes them doesn’t even bother including instructions.

Challenge #1: Getting Started

I thought I prepared adequately to incorporate a looper pedal into my life. I planned to get a tutorial at the store by one of the Music & Arts Center’s managers, and carved some time into my schedule for practice.

The tutorial went pretty well — except that I kept mistaking how many times I’d have to stomp on each of the knobs to start and stop recording my “loops” — sequences of chord progressions. Because there are only a couple of big knobs, a lot of stomping combinations is required to do various things — and it’s easy to over-stomp.

My instructor, a nice guy named Charlie, even let me film him setting up the looper pedal. Then he watched over me as I practiced. So far, so good.

I was convinced I was about to change my life.

At this point, any other musician dude who bought this pedal would have taken it home and jammed out for hours. For me, this wasn’t possible. It was a Friday afternoon, I had to pick up my kids from school and do mommy stuff, like make dinner, bathe my kids, and hang out with them (and my husband) for family movie night. And by the time said kids went down for bed, I was too exhausted to plug and play.

When I finally got an hour to myself on Sunday, my momentum was killed when the 9-volt batteries I planned to use were out of juice. Why hadn’t someone recommended I buy the adaptor? Fortunately, my adorable preschoolers were more than delighted to go with mommy to the music store to buy one. However, I couldn’t just go home and use it because my 3-year-old would have wanted to pretend my guitar cables were snakes (and it is not fun to take them away from him!).

Challenge #2: Finding Time to Practice

One week after purchasing my Ditto looper pedal, I FINALLY carved an hour out of my life to play with the damn thing. I had to watch my homemade video several times to configure my setup correctly, and I made several mistakes (stomping the wrong amount of time, etc.) before successfully recording my first loops.

When I finally recorded one, the levels were so soft that I couldn’t hear it (this shouldn’t have surprised me, because my second amp is just a Vox mini 5-watt amp, but still: it annoyed me. I want to sound like two guitars NOW … not in three months when I can finally save enough money to buy a decent-size second amplifier!!

Challenge #3: Feeling Kind of Regretful — but Hopeful? 

I’ve come to realize, sadly, that the Ditto looper’s customer isn’t a guitar-playing mom. It may possibly be a weekend warrior dad, but it definitely isn’t me.

It’s for the dude who has plenty of extra time to fool around with pedals and pedal boards, without worrying about who will watch the kids.

Unsurprisingly, there are no demos of women playing the Ditto looper pedal on the company’s websites. Most of the reviews (like this one) and video demos are super positive, and sing the praises of this “low key” piece of equipment. They’re all written by men, too, from what I can tell.

I would love it if a soccer mom — or at least a woman! — would demo this pedal and how hard it is to use. Until that happens, I’ll be the token soccer mom and — hopefully soon! — post a video that helps another rocker mom feel bold and empowered.

Throughout spring and summer, I’m going to try to practice as much as I can with it — which at this point, means I’ll get to play with it about once a week. Hopefully, I’ll be proficient by the time football season rolls around (and my kids will want to watch football with their dad so I can play it).

— Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the editor and founder of Rockmommy.

by Marisa Torrieri Bloom

So had this whole vision of making March a true “Rockmommy month.” Time-strapped as I am, I would play two to three hours of guitar every week NO MATTER WHAT.

I started off with a bang, playing guitar at every possible free moment, and then some. After my kids went to bed, I’d strum. In the middle of a busy day, I’d strum. When talking on the phone to my spouse, I’d strum.

This worked well for a few days.

Most of you know that my main paid gigs are teaching guitar and freelance writing. My work is second only to motherhood and marriage. On March 3, I scored an insanely good opportunity to go out of town (to D.C.!) to cover a show. The same day, I got called up to do several other assignments. Life got suddenly busy again, but I was still determined to stick to my “two hours no matter what” promise.

Then my younger kid got sick with pinkeye, which wiped out a whole day. After the insanely D.C. show, it snowed on my birthday (which wiped out another day). Then, I got sick with the mother of all colds, complete with a sore throat and ear infection (my first in a decade or so).

By mid-March, I subconsciously shelved my disciplined guitar-playing resolve so I could focus on caring for my sick kids, working, cleaning, recovering, and building snowmen in the unexpectedly frosty March weather.

By the end of March, I was finally able to pick up my beloved instruments again, which I’d only played while teaching.

I alternated between feeling guilty for abandoning my guitar-player goals and feeling OK about it. On the one hand, I truly believe that setting goals is the way to achieve productivity and happiness. On the other hand, I’m a mom of two little boys! Feeding healthy meals to my kids, playing with Legos and pirate ships, and ensuring everyone’s clothes are clean is what I do. It’s my job. I don’t have help 24/7 — my husband is super busy in his own career and we don’t have a nanny to do all of my housework while entertaining my little guys. That, and I value the quality of my freelance writing! I can’t submit an article that’s half-assed and uninspired.

Now that it’s April, I’m back on track with my guitar-playing goals. I’m going to do my absolute freaking best to play 20 minutes to 30 minutes a day, gradually increasing the time I spend practicing as I get closer to my next gig, scheduled for May 20th.

Having goals keeps us motivated and driven. But when life happens, staying on track with goals isn’t easy — and it’s alright if progress slows a bit. This is true whether you’re trying to stay in shape, lose weight, knit a sweater, finish a novel, or play guitar for half an hour a day.

And should life get insane again, I hope I can do a better job of cutting myself some slack.

— Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the editor and founder of Rockmommy.

by Marisa Torrieri Bloom 

Like lots of creative moms in their pre-kiddo days, rock singer Krissy Dale didn’t have the luxury of pursuing her craft whenever the opportunity arose and motivation struck. Instead, she spent her 9-to-5 hours working an office job, which left only nights and weekends for getting her musical fix as a singer for several cover bands in Connecticut’s Gold Coast area.

And like every rockmommy, when Krissy had her first child — daughter Lyla, 6 — things got that much tougher.

Krissy Dale, with her portrait of Prince.

Still, in spite of the guilt from leaving her daughter to play shows at night, adjusting to her husband Bryan’s career in the entertainment industry (as a singer and head of a karaoke company, Kings of Karaoke), and trying to get ahead in her daytime career, she managed to make it work.

Until one day, it just didn’t.

Shortly after the Dales relocated to Atlanta in 2013, Krissy found herself working her day job nonstop, trying to help her now-preschool-age daughter adjust, and overwhelmed by all the changes in her life. Then she got pregnant with baby #2. After her son was born, Krissy found her life had gotten even more hectic than she’d imagined. The only chance she got to sing was when her daughter was playing with music toys or watching a musical — most of her artistic energies went to helping her kids with their own projects.

Fortunately, as 2016 neared the halfway point, she would discover, almost by accident, that her creative days were far from over.

It was just before June that Krissy picked up paintbrush on a lark— the first time in more than a decade, when she minored in art in college — in an attempt to paint the most perfect birthday present for her husband. In the process, she realized that the outlet of painting filled her with the same joy she felt as a singer, while helping to calm her frazzled nerves.

Eleven months later, she’s added to the Prince portrait, with stunning profiles of popular musicians and other figures — including haunting close-ups of Kurt Cobain, Amy Winehouse, and Robin Williams. Her paintings are hypnotizing to look at, and, as anyone who’s seen them up close will tell you, evoke so many different emotions simultaneously (see her whole collection at KDaleartwork.com). And in doing so, they offer intimate glimpses at the most powerful, talented, creative and sometimes troubled individuals whose bodies of work continue to inspire so many.

Here, Krissy tells us about her journey from singing to painting, and offers advice on how to balance it all when you have so many balls in the air but can’t afford to drop any of them.

Rockmommy: When I first met you, you were a mama to be, and an aspiring singer! Could you tell us a little more about how you got started in music? 

Krissy Dale: Growing up, I admired every musician on the radio in the ’80s and ’90s – Whitney Houston, Chicago, Mariah Carey, Shanice, Boys II Men, Groove Theory. Hearing their voices inspired me to find me own voice. As a natural introvert, it didn’t come easily! I would write lyrics on a piece of paper, seal them in a plastic Ziploc bag and practice over and over in the shower… until we ran out of hot water.

Krissy Dale at home in Atlanta

I took vocal lessons with Rose Coppola (RVP Studios), which built my confidence to immerse myself in musical theater in high school and land the lead role of Florence Vassey in “Chess.” I went to college at Fordham University in New York and met my Manager, TJ O’Sullivan, and producers Lou Bastian and Tony Detullio. We wrote a ton and recorded songs I’m still proud of.  Post-college, I played Rusty in the regional musical theater production of “Footloose” – then transitioned into the cover band scene in Connecticut while finishing my Master’s degree in Industrial/Organizational psychology. By day, I worked full-time in human resources at Fairfield University. By night, I was singing all over Connecticut with crazy cover bands and loving every second.

Rockmommy: When you had your first baby, how did you stay connected to the music scene? What were some of the challenges? 

I performed with my band FML until I was 8 months preggers with Lyla (baby #1), and hung up my cover band hat to adjust to motherhood. It didn’t take long for me to reacquire the itch to get back into the music scene to a high-energy band called Pulse. I limited performances to twice a month since I was working full time as well. Challenges included 1) being totally obsessed with my daughter and wanting to be with her 24/7, 2) quickly climbing the ladder in my daytime career, 3) dealing with the guilt of leaving my baby for shows at nigh, and 4) juggling my hubby’s schedule. He worked nights running his booming karaoke entertainment company – and was also the lead singer of his own band, Fake ID at the time.

Somewhere in there I slept. I nursed Lyla for a little over a year, so if I wasn’t sleeping, I literally was always attached to a boob pump. I look back now and have NO clue how I had the energy.

Rockmommy: Can you tell us about your move to art, or painting in particular?

Krissy Dale: In 2013, my career moved us to Georgia, which severed most of my cover band and studio recording ties due to distance. We added a second kiddo into the mix a year later in 2014 – and life went from busy to insane. I worked a lot, Bryan’s karaoke business in Georgia was flourishing, and I no longer had time to think straight, never mind invest time in my music… or myself. We had two babies, a house, new friends, new investments, much heavier responsibilities.

Like many mommies, I lost myself. Between 2015 to 2016, I was burning out at a rapid rate.

In May 2016 I painted a portrait of Prince for Bryan’s 40^th birthday gift. While painting, a wave of calm washed over me — reminding me of life’s important lesson: enjoy the journey. It was less about the final product and more about the actual act of painting and carving out time for myself.

As a visual art minor at Fordham, I had taken classes at Lincoln Center and was taught by extremely talented and inspiring individuals. It was great to get back to this integral and creative part of who I was.

Rockmommy: Why do you love painting other musicians? What is it about certain personalities that inspires you?

Painting musicians helps connect my love for music and art together. The stories and lives of each artist are remarkable, inspiring and sometimes painful. Through art, I pay respect and express deep appreciation to these amazing individuals who have touched my life is some way.

Rockmommy: With your busy schedule, how — and when — do you find time to paint? 

Krissy Dale: It is a juggling act! And takes some planning. During the work-week, after the kids are fast asleep, I plan one night to paint for two hours. The other four nights are dedicated to QT with the hubby, kiddos, friends, catching up on work, and going to bed early. Sometimes it happens according to plan, sometimes it doesn’t.

On the weekends, I paint when I can and wherever is most convenient – if my kids are playing outside, I take my canvas outside. If they are eating, I’m painting in the kitchen. If they are napping, I’m in the tranquility of my bedroom painting away. Some weekends it happens, some weekends it doesn’t.

I look forward to that time tremendously.

Rockmommy: What advice do you have to other moms, in terms of trying to balance everything? 

Krissy Dale: It’s hard, and I don’t have it all figured it out. I have days I literally want to chug a bottle of wine when I walk through the door after work – or shamelessly shovel fruit snacks in my mouth while hiding in the pantry from my children.

Most days I’m living minute to minute, but when I can I bake time into the week to slow down.  Sometimes it happens as planned, sometimes it doesn’t. As rock mommies, we naturally put others first, but carving out ‘you’ time is really cool for your kids to witness – even if it’s an hour here or there.

Lastly, I’d encourage you to spend that time creating a better version of yourself – read a book, volunteer, learn something, create something, inspire others.

— Marisa Torrieri Bloom is the founder and editor of Rockmommy.